The gist of the thirty second preview of tonight’s episode is that everyone is crying. About what? I couldn’t say. (Maybe they’ve finally realized that their chances of finding true love on this show are slim to none.) But let’s launch into this recap. This week the show takes the girls and Ben to his hometown: Warsaw, Indiana.
Where did we leave off? Oh yes, I remember.
Ben has pulled Olivia off to the side but a question still lingers in the air: Will he take the rose away from her?
The first three minutes of the show are interrupted with a special news report about the Iowa Caucus. I’m sorry, but how is this more important than The Bachelor? Unless they are going to be caucusing on Lauren B. versus JoJo, I really don’t have time for this right now. ABC, know your audience. After the scariest three minutes of my life when the fate of this blog hung in the balance, ABC cuts back to the show. Thank god.
It’s all coming up tonight on The Bachelor:
Did you know that Ben is “the greatest bachelor on the planet” and “to the T the perfect man?” After 30 seconds of this week’s episode, I learned both of those things.
Everyone’s favorite documentary/piece of science fiction/comedy/drama, The Bachelor, is back. (The genre is up to the discretion of the viewer)
The live television event of the summer starts now:
The show opens with Chris Harrison asking a studio audience if they are excited. What do you think, Chris? What do you think?
This post is going to be a little shorter, I hope, because I have much less interest in what the boys have to say this season. Or any season. I really don’t love watching a bunch of boys in a room shit-talking some girl. I am excited to see Chris Harrison host a show again. This is the most airtime Chris Harrison will get all season. You get to see C.H. do 80% of his work each season all in a 2 hour episode.
Nick and Shawn have a heart to heart up in Nick’s room at the beginning of the episode. They paint each other’s nails, talk about their feelings, and braid each other’s hair. Actually, they both just call each other dicks and realize nothing new. Same old, same old.
Okay, Here's The Situation 