This week’s episode of The Bachelorette is a two-parter. In part one, Captain von Trapp hires fraulein Maria to be a nanny to his seven kids. In part two, he and Maria get married and fight the Nazis.
Wait, sorry guys. I’m doing that thing again where I mix up The Bachelorette and The Sound of Music. They both are set in scenic locales, they both heavily feature conflict, it’s an easy mistake.
When we last saw our friends they were in New Orleans, in the midst of the two-on-one date from hell. Taylor had made the gutsy decision to re-interrupt Corinne’s dinner date with Nick. Tonight’s episode features fourteen people on a search for love. These are their stories. *Dun Dun*
Taylor the re-interruptor (no comic book deal pending), comes back from the dead* to give Nick a stern talking to and to remind him that Corinne is NOT there for the right reasons.
*What do you mean they don’t kill the women off after they get kicked off the show? I thought that was part of the structure of the show. Sigh.
To start this week’s episode, Nick has a lot of ‘splaining to do. When we left him last, Nick had sent Liz home and decided that it was time he tell the rest of the girls that he had sex with Liz at the wedding last Spring.
Nick arrives for the rose ceremony to talk with the girls. He tells them all about the Liz situation and the girls seem pretty stoic about it. They all get a chance to tell him that they’re “processing,” and “blindsided,” and “shocked.”
Nick talks to all the girls and tells one of them that he “is a big fan” of her.
Sometimes I think I would be more psychologically healthy if I didn’t watch this television show. Unfortunately for me there is no twelve-step program designed to get me to stop watching, no nicotine-style patch to help me get over this addiction. So I’ll just keep writing until years and years into the future, with my dying breath, I whisper, “What even are the right reasons?”
There was a lot of reality television on last night, wasn’t there? But, relax. I’ll stick to what I know: The Bachelorette.
It’s hometown week. Come on, y’all. This week’s episode has to be a good one. (FYI, I’ll be adding the “y’all” periodically as I see fit during these hometown dates. We’re going to Texas, after all.)
The first hometown date of the episode is Chase. This is the portion of the episode I’ll refer to as: “The right relationship is everything.” For Chase’s hometown date, he brought JoJo to some random mountain in Colorado. I have to say that at first, it was a little unclear if he lived on the mountain or if there was a house somewhere for them to go. While sitting on the mountain, Chase confesses to JoJo that his parents are divorced and that the divorce was about as messy as one of JoJo’s top knots. More on this later.
The gist of the thirty second preview of tonight’s episode is that everyone is crying. About what? I couldn’t say. (Maybe they’ve finally realized that their chances of finding true love on this show are slim to none.) But let’s launch into this recap. This week the show takes the girls and Ben to his hometown: Warsaw, Indiana.
Okay, Here's The Situation 